Last night it rained a bit, and early this morning it rained a bit more here in northern Alabama. Shocking, I know. So when I drove into work this morning the roads were a little wet, and there were a few sprinkles along the way.
The road conditions were not perfect, but not bad either. There was a car in front of me most of the way to work. If a vehicle approached our road from a side road he’d start slowing down. If he came across a puddle in the road he’d swerve a bit to miss it. When people would pass him on the left he’d quickly move right as far as possible. His driving gave me the distinct impression that he was fearful of driving on the wet roads.
It wasn’t that any of the things he did were inherently bad ideas. Puddles can hide pot holes so avoiding them would seem wise. Except these puddles really weren’t that big which meant it was really unlikely there was an issue there. Sometimes people ignore stop signs so slowing down for the people approaching on side roads could seem a prudent precaution. But the vehicles on the side roads were going really slow and showed no signs of bolting out. And giving someone a wide berth when they pass you would seem reasonable, if he wasn’t moving so far to the right he was crossing the line and driving on the shoulder. He appeared way more fearful than he should have been under the circumstances.
When you experience a small amount of fear, that’s a good thing. It’s your mind’s warning system telling you to start being more vigilant. Experience too much fear and it quickly become negative. You begin overreacting and stressing out, neither of which is good for you. If the level of fear rises high enough it can even be crippling, keeping you frozen and unable to react at all.
Making things worse is the fact that your mind doesn’t know the difference between a real threat you should fear, and a perceived threat, that only has the potential for harm because a perception in itself isn’t harmful. Seneca famously stated “We are more often frightened than hurt; and we suffer more in imagination than in reality.” Or more simply, fear’s bark is often much worse than its bite.
So how do you fix this? How do you keep fear at the smaller level of a simple warning system? You be mindful. If you are keeping yourself focused on the here and now there’s less time to focus on the fear. If you aren’t focused on the fear, it can’t grow. If you’re focused on the here and now you can make decisions in the present moment, not the feared future. And when you’re making those decisions mindfully and calmly you’re seeing more options and making better decisions.
Mindfulness is a form of meditation, which means it’s stress reducing, which reduces anxiety and fear. It promotes calmness, which reduces fear. It makes you happier, which reduces fear. It enhances gratitude, which reduces fear.
Why focus on an imaginary future of fears and worries when you could spend that time quietly thinking to yourself that “you’ve got this” and that “I am more than enough.” Focus on the good things in life. Or dwell in fear. The choice is yours. Me, I’m going with calmness, happiness, and gratitude. I hope you do to. Have a great day.
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